Emily Heller

Two different lovely women sent me this video in the past couple days:

Bea Arthur was so amazing. Such depth of feeling in that performance. That episode centered around Dorothy being in a lonely slump and Blanche taking her out to her favorite bar to get her socializing again. She sits there awkwardly, unable to connect with anyone for a bit before she starts singing along with the pianist.

I can’t help but notice the similarity in sentiment between that song and this one:

Same central question: What do I do?

Such a common, simple question but it bears articulating anyway. Mostly because articulating is the only thing you can do about feeling that wondering, especially in the face of emptiness or change. I don’t know what’s ahead of me right now and while I enjoy that feeling, there is a big scary question mark on everything, too. I hate adulthood. But I love Bea Arthur. And I love the Mountain Goats. And both of those videos make me feel a little less alone.

God I’m so emo right now.